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For women with hyper-independent tendencies, especially those rooted in trauma, birthdays can feel even heavier. Hyper independence teaches you that if you don’t plan it, it won’t happen right. That if you don’t control the details, you’ll be disappointed. So instead of resting into joy, you’re bracing for responsibility — even on the one day meant to be soft. This year, I wanted something different. I wanted ease. I wanted to feel chosen, not just capable. And that’s how I found myself walking into Bombay DarBar — not as the planner, but as the guest.

A Soft Girl's Birthday Dinner- Bombay Darbar Review

Birthdays, as a woman, can be surprisingly stressful. There’s an unspoken pressure to make the day perfect — to plan the outfit, curate the vibe, organize the dinner, capture the photos, and still appear effortlessly grateful while doing it all. Somewhere along the way, celebration turns into management. For women with hyper-independent tendencies, especially those rooted in trauma, birthdays can feel even heavier. Hyper independence teaches you that if you don’t plan it, it

Vanessa Gonzalez

Feb 12

Things to Do This Summer That Involves Your Belly: Camping at Fern Forest Eco Village

Summer has officially started and to kick it off I did something I’ve been wanting to do for a while—camping!

Vanessa Gonzalez

Jul 6, 2025